Hello Everyone!
We apologize for the course blog being a little late this week...Zach and I decided a great topic for the blog this week would be focusing on the Shapiro article we read in class last week. It seemed to be a very interesting article and seemed to affect the class as a whole. We noticed not everyone got a chance to speak in class so we wanted to take the opportunity to open the blog up to everyone's personal stories this week. Zach shared his story of parents and college in class however I did not. My parents are the opposite of Zach's, however they are not extreme parents...just caring parents. My mother was always reminding me of college application deadlines, essays, and things I needed to do while preparing for college. Orientation week and letting go was a very hard concept for my parents, they offer their opinions on class schedules and major decisions, but will support me in whatever I choose to do. They continue to call everyday twice a day just to check up and say they miss me, which I appreciate because I miss them too. I would classify my parents in the middle of the spectrum and I am very grateful for that. They have been a huge part of my success and will continue to be. Where do you classify your parents? Is this comfortable for you? Please share your stories!! Have A Great Week Everyone!
Subscribe to:
Post Comments (Atom)
I agree that this was a very interesting article. My parents are just the opposite of Zach's. I am so grateful and thankful for the parents that I have. Neither of my parents had a great deal of education when they were younger, my dad dropped out in ninth grade and my mom just finished high school. They both feel that education is extremely important because my dad had to work so hard to make up for not being educated. They put me through the best education possible and sacrificed everything so that I could be where I am today. Although they were never able to help me with homework or academic problems they were always there to be a shoulder to cry. They never pressured me to do anything I didn't want to and always encouraged and stood behind every decision i made independently. It was always completely up to me what I wanted to do with my life, but they always said they would support me in whatever I did. I am so close with my parents and so thankful for them to what they have done for me,
ReplyDeleteIt was very interesting to hear about the different ways that people were raised and how that "nurture" affects their personalities and viewpoints. My parents have always been extremely involved in my life and my decisions. In many ways, this has become a negative impact on my life; because they have so much input and control on my personal choices, I don't gain experience on how to learn from my mistakes or grow as an individual. On the other hand, my parents have instilled in me a very strong determination and values that have made me successful in my life here at DU as well as other situations. When it comes down to it, I believe that a good balance of parental control is vital to ones success as an individual. Even though I become furious when my mom opens my mail or invades my life, I do appreciate my parents greatly for the important life skills they have given me. To be fair, they have begun to successfully give me my own space and back off. It is hard for both the child and the parents to divide their lives from one another. However, it is worth the self sufficiency.
ReplyDeleteAs it turns out, my parents are both teachers. My dad is a professor, and my mom is an English teacher, so naturally school and education are a big deal. However, they aren't the kind of parents who say "you better get straight A's or else..." They encourage me to try my best and are certainly always there to help me or give me advice when I need it. Fortunately, the can help me with any subject any time. They call occasionally, but mostly wait for me to call them and they have certainly given me freedom. This doesn't really surprise be because I haven't done anything for them to think that I would get into trouble or not do well in school. I feel like my parents really trust me.
ReplyDeleteOver the years my parents have put me through some pretty difficult, but rewarding times. When I was 5 we moved to Zimbabwe, Africa for just over a year. I went to the international school there and was the only American in my entire pre-school class. Again when I was 10 we moved back to Africa, this time to Kenya. The international school was full so I had to attend a missionary school. Since my family is not at all religious it was extremely difficult for me to get through missionary school, but in the end I think I came out a stronger person. My junior year in high school we moved to Italy for most of the year and I took online classes. Not only was it hard for me to motivate myself, it was also difficult not having any peers when taking classes. As one can see, my parents have put me through some pretty difficult situations when it comes to school, but I overall I think I have gained a lot from these experiences and I'm glad they put me through them.
While my parents are certainly very supportive of me and value education, they are also very adamant in their belief that developing independence and "finding your self" are essential. Thus, as I was growing up, my parents pushed me into nothing; they did not insist I take ballet,or piano,or basketball,or soccer when I told them I wanted to quit, and they never nagged me about my grades. They let me wear the same sweater every day in kindergarten (though that caused difficulties in my mom's laundry schedule...), and when it came time for me to apply to colleges, they were as physically distant from the event as possible. There were no reminders of deadlines posted on the fridge, and my mother never begged to read my application essays. That is not to say my parents were not supportive, however. While they may not have known all the details of my application process, they were always there to calm and comfort me when the stress overwhelmed me. In the same way, they listened to me rant about what schools I would like to go to even though they didn't know all the schools I was actually applying to. Throughout my childhood, my parents have been my closest friends (while still being parents, of course). I talk to them about everything, and like friends, they do not insert themselves into decisions I have to make.They have forced me to be independent. It was that way my entire childhood. I was forced to make decisions even when I begged my parents to choose for me. Yet in that I believe I gained a certain self-suffiency I would not otherwise have now. My parents are not paying for my schooling, and I can technically say I am economically independent, even though my parents still claim me as a dependent. Still, that doesn't mean I don't call my parents every day (I do) or my mom doesn't send me care packages with socks and books and my favorite chocolate (she does). It just means that in wisdom my parents recognized that their children were also people,who at some point in time were going to have to run their their own lives. My parents' hope was (and is) that each of their four children would find "their path in life." As my dad says, and has always said, "People are going to choose what it is in them, and they should. That means you too, MK. Now choose."
ReplyDeleteI would say my parents are somewhere near Allison's on the spectrum. Though they limit their phone calls to a few times a week, they like to know how I'm doing with school stuff and make sure I am on track. My mom was definitely more active in reminding me of application deadlines and scholarship opportunities. She always makes sure I am checking my grades and keeping up with my work. While there are times when I could just scream for her to get off my back, I actually really appreciate how much she cares. I think part of the reason I have maintained good grades and done well in school is because she encouraged me to do well and stay on track. It has been really helpful having someone to push me a little bit. My dad is less active in reminding me of deadlines and asking about grades, but by no means less supportive. He also encourages me to do as well as I can, and make use of my education. My parents have been at the perfect place on the spectrum for me.
ReplyDeleteMy parents can sometimes be very demanding and extreme, but for the most part they are pretty relaxed and let me live the life I choose. They have pretty time-consuming jobs so when they do have time to spend with me they rather it be more enjoyable then involve conflict. They respect my decisions, but they challenge them and make sure that I realize what they believe is the best route. I have become pretty independent in the last couple of years. I feel as if they are happy that I am so independent, but sometimes they can freak out if they feel like I am doing something that is experimental or risky. For example, my mother was pretty worried about me going to a school so far away from home. She did not know if I was ready for what I thought I was. She thought it was going to be very hard for me to make the transition and was scared of letting me go. My dad, on the other hand, thought it was a great decision and completely supported me. After going here and starting to form a new life here, she now seems more confident of my abilities and decisions.
ReplyDeleteI would classify my parents as somewhere in the middle of the spectrum. On some occasions they can be far to overbearing, my mom especially. When given the opportunity to talk about my decisions when not in my presence, my parents tend to come away with the agreement that they need to know Everything. All of the little details. To the point of being wildly tedious and somewhat frustrating. Once they get every necessary detail, and some unnecessary details, they tend to be accepting of my decisions. In some ways this meticulousness of my parents is good, because it forces me to be aware of every aspect of my decisions. But in some ways, it could not be more frustrating, and I hang up the phone never wanting to call my house again. The most recent example of this was when I was applying to study abroad in Bologna. I called my parents to tell them about this amazing opportunity and they all but shut it down. I was devastated and hating my over-controlling parents. The next time I talked to my parents, they didn't outright disagree with my plan, they just asked me about every, single, tiny, mundane, insignificant detail about this program and the possible programs I would apply for junior year. Again, I hung up the phone hugely irritated. But the next day my parents called me and told me to apply, and to be sure to apply for the scholarships that were available. While it seemed annoying and controlling at the time, my parents came through, as they often tend to.
ReplyDelete